For months I’ve been praying and crying out for a lasting restoration of joy, peace, and contentment but I wasn’t in proper position to receive it. I unknowingly had both hands up blocking what God had repeatedly sent me.
I was in the business of asking God for help and then taking over his job. I worked hard to fill every void, and as people (my fillers) acted up or disappeared the voids became wider. As those things (more fillers) that once momentarily quenched a deserted part of my soul were no longer available to me, I became all the more lost and broken. I gasped for any and everything to give me life including Jesus but as soon as I grabbed hold I let go for what was directly in front of me.
Grabbing onto temporary people and things makes it difficult to see what God is really trying to do in our lives. We have to leave ourselves open so God can give. We have to be in a position where we are open to receive the blessings he pours out. And we have to believe that we are worthy to receive those blessings.
Last week as I sat in a meeting at church I was overcome with just about every negative emotion I have felt in the last 9 months. All I knew to do was go to the altar. I made my concerns known to God for the millionth time but this time I opened my heart to receive only him regardless of how undeserving I felt of his love. From that moment on, his overwhelming presence has met me wherever I go and done some major restoring.
One thing I learned over the last few weeks is that condemnation will lead us to reject a gracious and merciful God. When you don’t feel deserving of his love, you won’t receive it. Therefore you won’t receive the liberty, peace, joy, or cleansing that he imparts. This leaves us to seek these gifts out in temporary people, places, and things that can kick start a cycle of greater condemnation –> further rejection of the God you’re praying to— > deeper into the sins which tear us away from him.
Breaking the cycle involves knowing that you are not condemned but redeemed.
Our God is loving. (1 John 4:8)
Our God sees the pureness of your heart. (1 Samuel 16:7)
Our God knows your desires and is more than willing to provide them. (Psalm 37:4)
Our God is forgiving and our God wants you to know that Jesus already paid the price for everything you feel guilty about. Everything keeping you from fully receiving the gifts of God you’ve asked for. (Romans 3:21-26)
You’re forgiven! Receive him. If you’re in need of him call him but you have to be in right position to receive from him. Let go of the guilt of yesterday and of the temporary fillers and reach for the everlasting Father. I guarantee you he will pull you up and out.
Psalm 91: 14-16
14 “Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him; I will set him on high, because he has known My name.
15 He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honor him.
16 With long life I will satisfy him, And show him My salvation.”