Abandoned, alone, by oneself, comfortless, companionless, isolated, forsaken, outcast, rejected, secluded, single, withdrawn… These are all synonyms for being lonely. It’s true that life’s journey can be extremely lonely, especially when you are walking on a path towards better. One may feel alone in a crowded place, which is a horrible feeling, and others may actually physically be alone left with no other soul on earth in their corner at the moment (I’m sorry if you’re in that place). Moments of feeling forsaken are bound to come up. Especially on this faith walk that many of us Christians are on but you don’t have to add to the hermit like feeling. A hermit is a person who has withdrawn to a solitary place, someone who is living in seclusion. While there are times that God does remove us from certain jobs, churches, friends, or even from family members, there are many times we remove ourselves and blame God for our loneliness. In either situation I want to encourage you to reach out in 3 ways! 1. Reach out to (positive) others! Invite a platonic friend over to watch a movie or eat. If one person says no, don’t take it personal ask someone else! We are adults and people have way more complicated lives than we did at age 6! If you have no friends make a plan to reach out to that person you have been considering making your friend. Yea it’s awkward at first but some of my most awesome friends came out of my most awkward moments of “will you be my friend” type approaches! (Shout out to “Cokez” my first friend at USC) 2. Reach out to God Should I have put this first? Of course I should have, God should always be the first option but the reality is most of us will reach out to a friend before we pray to God. That’s why it’s important we have some godly friends that will always point us back to him! (IJS, that’s something for you to think about) The word says that God will never leave us or forsake us (Deut 31:6; Heb 13:5). So this means that he is always present and ready for us to speak to him through prayer and through reading the word. While you’re at it, ask him why you have been feeling so lonely. Guarantee you he will answer you in some way. In the past as I sought answers to this question I would figure out that I was depressed, I chose to isolate myself from everyone for a particular reason, and even finding out that my friends were going through tough times and feeling lonely too and I needed to reach out to them. The point, get to the root of your loneliness problem. Connecting with God is the best way to begin that process. 3. Reach out to yourself Does that make sense? Yes! At some point in your life you are going to have to be okay with chillin with yourself. And I mean like really be okay with it. Like go to the mall, grab a bite to eat (without getting on your phone to check social networks), go see a movie or a show, chillin with yourself. And not just once a year, being able to do it all the time if you had to! When it comes down to it, you’re the only human that is going to be there 24/7, rain or shine, whether you like it or not. It would be very helpful to not hate spending that quality alone time with yourself. Get comfortable with yourself, hold on to God, and reach out to the people that you have chosen as friends! Lonely seasons will come up but they don’t have to remain! Reach out!!! |
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